yoga, books, movies, tv & too many crime procedurals – not necesarily in that order
Watching the Star Trek reboot for at least the 5th time. Sign of good photography? The fight scene on the drill squicks my height issues EVERY single time I see it.
Right now we’re nerding out with ST, I’m enjoying another glass of Big Fire pinot noir, hoping Dave’s dog won’t howl at us some more and LOVING Simon Pegg as Mr. Scott. New True Blood AND Mad Men tonight. w00t!
In about five hours it will have been five years since my dad died.
This is not the anniversary I want to remember, but it’s in there with all of them – my parents’ wedding anniversary (November 4) Dad’s birthday (August 17) my birthday (August 20) my anniversary (May 27) my sister’s birthday (September 27) my mom’s birthday (September 14).
I still miss him every day. When someone dies, people always say “It gets better with time.” It turns out that’s mostly bullshit. Sure, I can have conversations about my dad without bursting into tears – unlike the first year – but my eyes frequently well up. The urge to call him on the phone hasn’t subsided.
I try to keep the memories on top the ones before he got sick but really, you can’t just MAKE that happen. For example, I’m watching 2012 yesterday and while everyone talked about what a shit film it was but how good that one action sequence is, everyone left out the farewell conversation between father and son which pretty much leveled me. It was so much like conversations I had with my dad before he died and suddenly I just couldn’t breathe.
There are parts in books or in films or on TV that get me that way, some small interaction or a glance or a conversation and it just doesn’t ever go away.
Do I want it to? Yes and no. Would it be nice to return to that (comparative) innocence before he died. Yeah. On the other hand, it reminds me every single day to let go of the bullshit, take deep breaths, smile when you don’t feel like it. Every single day you wake up is a GOOD DAY.
I haven’t had a dream about him in a while and that feels okay.
I still want to talk to him.
Whoever wrote this commercial KNOWS ME.
Whenever there’s a number to call for a business I’m super-disappointed and thinking “DUDE, WHY IS THERE NOT A WEBLINK. I don’t want to talk to ANYONE.”
Related: noticing a larger number of commercials on NPR that feature an email address rather than phone number. Awesome.
I like rules. REALLY like rules. Most people who meet me would probably not expect that.
It’s true that in a lot of things I find rules to be arbitrary or not well thought out. However at work, rules are a girl’s best friend. For example: today I had a vendor show up an hour past our posted dock hours. I told them to take a hike, albeit politely and even apologetically. They were disgruntled.
This is one of those situations where the rule actually MAKES SENSE. My job is more than waiting around for vendors. The vendors stop showing up 2.5 hours before I go home so that I have time to DO OTHER SHIT. Important shit, for that matter. They groused about what the old guy in my job would do – for the record, NOT a good idea because I’M NOT HIM – and my response was “Tough shit.”
I honestly believe in the immortal words of Dalton: Be nice until it’s time to not be nice.
These guys knew full well they were after hours. Rather than apologize and suck it up, they tried to bully me. No surprise, I don’t respond well to bullying. It gets my back up. THEN, they did a B.S. song and dance for another guy at the store and got him to come to me on their behalf. To which I said “AbsoFUCKINGLUTELY not.” Because before, I’m giving you a grace – I’m new and not going to bust your balls. NOW I’M PISSED. So your options are to show up tomorrow or I call your boss. AND now I will NEVER give you a minute past my hours because you pulled this bullshit trip.
Pissing me off twice in the same shift is pretty impressive. Burning BOTH of your chances within a half an hour has to be a record. My foot in your ass, let me show you it.
I feel like I keep saying I’m swamped but I frankly still feel like I’m swamped. There are possible (good) changes afoot at work but I won’t know more on that until the end of the week. In the meantime we’re making an almost-cross-country roadtrip for a wedding. With any luck at all I’ll be able to update from the road.
Right now I’m geeking out in my basement while my Kindle software updates and I avoid packing my clothes. Before I go to bed I have to have all my clothing packed and pretty much be ready to go as soon as I get home from work.
Packing list:
roadsnacks
music – update mini-player
clothes:
1. shorts because it will be hotter than the third circle of hell, plus humidity
2. skirt for wedding
3. nicer shorts for reception
4. black flats, green chucks
5. one pair of jeans because seriously, it’s MY vacation
6. toiletry kit
7. sox
8. one sweater, one jacket
9. one purse
10. metric asston of t-shirts in varying degrees of niceness
The most important thing has already been accomplished: loading a Dunkin Donuts locator onto my droid.
